When O has you, you know it. There may be no words or reasonable explanation for the acceptable occupation, but you know it and it knows you, whether it is between you and another or other space, place or atmosphere, O has you like the air you breathe, without thinking, you are happy to be there, occupied by O.
O...I know just what you mean.
O...is enough, no matter what anyone else thinks.
O...I love you and know you love me
O...is an agreement from wherever it comes
O...is the perfect space, my parentheses enclosed
O...is me and the other as not another at all
O...is a circle of love
(for my muse)
PS...Brother John said he had only one thing to say to this, 'O shit!?'
Friday, April 29, 2011
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Chastity
Chastity is Ben Franklin’s twelfth virtue I shall be considering this week. Chastity was Ben’s final virtue to practise for many years before an Amish friend insisted he was missing Humility, whereby Ben inserted Humility making thirteen virtues to practise and threw his mathematically complimentary practise into a nose dive. Adding Humility to an already humiliating process reminds me of how we often attempt to fix or better someone else’s perfectly fine anything, without knowing better. I know for certain the man who suggested to Ben that he was missing Humility as a virtue, had not attempted this practise Ben set out, as the entire act, is one steeped in humility.
So, next week, I return to Temperance, skipping the lately inserted Humility (methinks she resists too much you may think) and start all over again. But, first, the tricky subject of Chastity. And, the interesting way in which Ben wrote its guideline:
Rarely use venery but for health or offspring, never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another’s peace or reputation.
Now, that’s what I call a tightly packed sandwich. And, I think it important to point out that there are two definitions of ‘venery’, of which, one comes from the Old French and means ‘to chase or hunt’ (for food) and one from Latin and means ‘to seek sexual intercourse’. You might ask in our time, so what’s the difference, and, I might have to agree that most of us live in a world wherein we do not go out and hunt our own food, but seem ‘to hunt’ for that ‘other’ to perform sex with, and thereby is a marriage of these different meanings of 'venery' into a common ceremony that Ben might not have been as privy to, but I believe he definitely alluded to in his choice of words.
So, how often is rarely?
But, that is not really the issue for the main event; the point is what do we do with our common need for sexual expression, and what do we teach our children?
As a child, I can remember the first time I heard the word ‘chastity’, it was in a book and combined with the word ‘belt’. I did not understand the reason to put such a contraption upon a woman, and, I can remember holding that vision in my head without a conversation with anyone. So as I grew into adulthood and still without fail, when I hear or read the word, there is a visual I get that is very distasteful. The things mankind has dreamed up to protect their ideas behind a word are definitively injurious. I’ve had a scratch I could not itch since I first read about a ‘chastity belt’...
And now, now that I have run the course of contemplating my own health, my offspring, and what dull, weak and injurious propositions have I brought to another’s peace or reputation, or my own, by the choices of venery I have made...this act of contemplation is humbling enough for a lifetime, much less a week, and I find myself wondering where could I get a ‘chastity belt’?!
Rarely ain’t ‘Good Enough’, my friend Ben.
So, next week, I return to Temperance, skipping the lately inserted Humility (methinks she resists too much you may think) and start all over again. But, first, the tricky subject of Chastity. And, the interesting way in which Ben wrote its guideline:
Rarely use venery but for health or offspring, never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another’s peace or reputation.
Now, that’s what I call a tightly packed sandwich. And, I think it important to point out that there are two definitions of ‘venery’, of which, one comes from the Old French and means ‘to chase or hunt’ (for food) and one from Latin and means ‘to seek sexual intercourse’. You might ask in our time, so what’s the difference, and, I might have to agree that most of us live in a world wherein we do not go out and hunt our own food, but seem ‘to hunt’ for that ‘other’ to perform sex with, and thereby is a marriage of these different meanings of 'venery' into a common ceremony that Ben might not have been as privy to, but I believe he definitely alluded to in his choice of words.
So, how often is rarely?
But, that is not really the issue for the main event; the point is what do we do with our common need for sexual expression, and what do we teach our children?
As a child, I can remember the first time I heard the word ‘chastity’, it was in a book and combined with the word ‘belt’. I did not understand the reason to put such a contraption upon a woman, and, I can remember holding that vision in my head without a conversation with anyone. So as I grew into adulthood and still without fail, when I hear or read the word, there is a visual I get that is very distasteful. The things mankind has dreamed up to protect their ideas behind a word are definitively injurious. I’ve had a scratch I could not itch since I first read about a ‘chastity belt’...
And now, now that I have run the course of contemplating my own health, my offspring, and what dull, weak and injurious propositions have I brought to another’s peace or reputation, or my own, by the choices of venery I have made...this act of contemplation is humbling enough for a lifetime, much less a week, and I find myself wondering where could I get a ‘chastity belt’?!
Rarely ain’t ‘Good Enough’, my friend Ben.
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Tranquillity Switch--Find Yours
I have a friend who told me to flip the switch in my mind, ‘just a little to the right of one o’clock’, and therein I would find the tranquillity I sought. Sounded crazy at the time—but that statement was one of the most profound statements anyone ever shared with me.
I like finding a ‘switch’ inside myself that takes me from an agitated state, into one of tranquillity. Something I feel we should all learn to find inside ourselves.
Sometimes I find mine, and sometimes I forget to look, sometimes I think I actually enjoy being agitated and that it acts just like washing the clothes, stirring me up so I can let all the dirt out. But, the truth is, there is enough dirt to last on this planet, what is truly rare is ‘ourselves’ in a state of tranquillity, self induced, and not with the help of pharmaceuticals.
And yet, there are those who become addicted to tranquillity, too, and I can’t say as I blame them, but it does become a bit much when the mother says to the little boy reporting that the house is on fire, ‘let it be’, I mean that’s one extreme way to annihilate all the house work.
Tranquillity, the absence of agitation of any kind, can be had, with the flip of a switch somewhere in the mind. But, it took me years to find mine. For many years I could feel myself go into a state of tranquillity every now and then without knowing what I had done. The first time I recall was in maths class when I was about twelve, so relaxed did I become from taking my mind somewhere else that I fell out of my chair. I can remember other children doing the same. Self induced states of tranquillity to avoid the pain of a boring subject, or teacher talking in monotone, but to find that switch self consciously as an adult takes a lot of work, that’s why they have seminars on it and charge you lots of money.
I spent a small fortune seeking tranquillity once upon a time, and I am here to tell you, I didn’t have to except that like most people looking for something without the effort it takes to find it, I gave money to people who promised to help me. They did help relieve me of the agitation of how to spend my money. No one else can help you find your own tranquillity switch, it takes one person sifting through the rubble of one’s own mind because all the switches are in different places inside every individual, ain’t it just like an angry god to do that?! Hide the tranquillity switches, quick...people all need to be agitated enough to put fires out, providing they discover fire, too, and they did, man did they.
Now, I am sure you were hoping I might be able to tell you how to do it, because I claim to have found mine, but the truth is, mine goes missing, too, and ‘a little to the right of one o’clock’ can become a different position depending on where you live on this planet, and if you are currently standing on your head or lying down, and of course what time zone you be in. Daylight savings can play havoc on locating a tranquillity switch, I promise.
The only thing I can tell you for sure is that if I have one, you probably do, too, or perhaps, like the difference between sexes, one seeking itself out of fear of the other’s more powerful one, hahaha, if you believe that, I have some swamp land I will sell you eventually, good night Freud, you were a smart man, but....
PS...Brother John just informed me that his tranquillity switch is in his little toe, so whenever it bothers him, he just hits it with a hammer and the tranquillity switch is turned on...and if that doesn’t work he takes a pair of channel locks and pinches his earlobe and everything comes ' a little right of one o’clock'.
PSS...I am not going to tell you what he does with his trowel!!!!
I like finding a ‘switch’ inside myself that takes me from an agitated state, into one of tranquillity. Something I feel we should all learn to find inside ourselves.
Sometimes I find mine, and sometimes I forget to look, sometimes I think I actually enjoy being agitated and that it acts just like washing the clothes, stirring me up so I can let all the dirt out. But, the truth is, there is enough dirt to last on this planet, what is truly rare is ‘ourselves’ in a state of tranquillity, self induced, and not with the help of pharmaceuticals.
And yet, there are those who become addicted to tranquillity, too, and I can’t say as I blame them, but it does become a bit much when the mother says to the little boy reporting that the house is on fire, ‘let it be’, I mean that’s one extreme way to annihilate all the house work.
Tranquillity, the absence of agitation of any kind, can be had, with the flip of a switch somewhere in the mind. But, it took me years to find mine. For many years I could feel myself go into a state of tranquillity every now and then without knowing what I had done. The first time I recall was in maths class when I was about twelve, so relaxed did I become from taking my mind somewhere else that I fell out of my chair. I can remember other children doing the same. Self induced states of tranquillity to avoid the pain of a boring subject, or teacher talking in monotone, but to find that switch self consciously as an adult takes a lot of work, that’s why they have seminars on it and charge you lots of money.
I spent a small fortune seeking tranquillity once upon a time, and I am here to tell you, I didn’t have to except that like most people looking for something without the effort it takes to find it, I gave money to people who promised to help me. They did help relieve me of the agitation of how to spend my money. No one else can help you find your own tranquillity switch, it takes one person sifting through the rubble of one’s own mind because all the switches are in different places inside every individual, ain’t it just like an angry god to do that?! Hide the tranquillity switches, quick...people all need to be agitated enough to put fires out, providing they discover fire, too, and they did, man did they.
Now, I am sure you were hoping I might be able to tell you how to do it, because I claim to have found mine, but the truth is, mine goes missing, too, and ‘a little to the right of one o’clock’ can become a different position depending on where you live on this planet, and if you are currently standing on your head or lying down, and of course what time zone you be in. Daylight savings can play havoc on locating a tranquillity switch, I promise.
The only thing I can tell you for sure is that if I have one, you probably do, too, or perhaps, like the difference between sexes, one seeking itself out of fear of the other’s more powerful one, hahaha, if you believe that, I have some swamp land I will sell you eventually, good night Freud, you were a smart man, but....
PS...Brother John just informed me that his tranquillity switch is in his little toe, so whenever it bothers him, he just hits it with a hammer and the tranquillity switch is turned on...and if that doesn’t work he takes a pair of channel locks and pinches his earlobe and everything comes ' a little right of one o’clock'.
PSS...I am not going to tell you what he does with his trowel!!!!
Monday, April 18, 2011
Finally, Tranquillity
Finally, Tranquillity...it’s been ten weeks coming according to Ben Franklin’s self improvement program, that I gladly adopted to experiment with and with a few reservations I am happy to have done it, but wow, do you find tranquillity a much needed respite after digging around for a week at a time looking for temperance, silence, order, resolution, frugality, sincerity, justice, moderation and cleanliness inside or surrounding one’s self. Phew! A hiatus is much needed....
And since tranquillity is just a subjective word that means so many different things to so many different ‘others’ that I am aware of out there every where deciding, just like I am, what does this mean? It means exactly what we each decide for it to and not one thing else.
Which reminds me of what happened to our friend Ben Franklin when sharing this whole process he had for perfecting himself, by himself, for himself...and, the original twelve virtues that he practised for years before an Amish friend chastised him for not having Humility listed as one of his virtues, and of course his good friend reminded him that that was one virtue sadly lacking in our friend Ben.
Well, from my way of thinking, after putting this process into play into my own life, I can say that humility is the one constant stance of anyone undergoing the discovery of these virtues as a reflection to one’s self...the whole process is a humbling one, and therefore, I object to the addition and find it placed there by a force outside the process who never tried it before trying to perfect it. So typical of progress, aye?
Next week will be Chastity and was originally the twelfth and final virtue before returning to do them all over again in a mathematical sequence that balanced out the year perfectly for moral improvement for one’s self...and, though I have it on my morality board as the final addition, I have checks by it for every other virtue I have attempted since starting this whole maddeningly self revealing process...I am a humble mess. I am nothing, as well as knowing nothing for sure which makes me rather enlightened by the standards of nothingness, which I am.
I have to laugh, as my board sits out in plain sight for all to see what I am up to (and is supplied on my blog for the world to peruse) ...and, I have discovered along the way that a few people I know are following along and doing the same. My daughter walked by yesterday and blatantly said, “Don’t think I am doing chastity with you!” and I had to laugh and explain that Ben’s idea of chastity was not abstinence of sexual gratification, but the use of it ‘for health’ and ‘offspring (like herself) and never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another’s peace or reputation’...she got a big smile and said ‘I like that man’.
Yes, I too, have always liked Ben Franklin, even if he didn’t do his own dishes. I wish I could discuss with him what he thought was tranquil in juxtaposition of what I find tranquil to be. For me, it is at this moment, just a feeling of not worrying about one ‘other’ thing, being in the moment of which I am without feeling the need to be anywhere else, do anything else or become anything more than I am at this moment. In theory, I am tranquil at the moment, as for me, writing is the most tranquil of places and spaces wherein I get to decide everything, the beginning, the middle, the end.
And since tranquillity is just a subjective word that means so many different things to so many different ‘others’ that I am aware of out there every where deciding, just like I am, what does this mean? It means exactly what we each decide for it to and not one thing else.
Which reminds me of what happened to our friend Ben Franklin when sharing this whole process he had for perfecting himself, by himself, for himself...and, the original twelve virtues that he practised for years before an Amish friend chastised him for not having Humility listed as one of his virtues, and of course his good friend reminded him that that was one virtue sadly lacking in our friend Ben.
Well, from my way of thinking, after putting this process into play into my own life, I can say that humility is the one constant stance of anyone undergoing the discovery of these virtues as a reflection to one’s self...the whole process is a humbling one, and therefore, I object to the addition and find it placed there by a force outside the process who never tried it before trying to perfect it. So typical of progress, aye?
Next week will be Chastity and was originally the twelfth and final virtue before returning to do them all over again in a mathematical sequence that balanced out the year perfectly for moral improvement for one’s self...and, though I have it on my morality board as the final addition, I have checks by it for every other virtue I have attempted since starting this whole maddeningly self revealing process...I am a humble mess. I am nothing, as well as knowing nothing for sure which makes me rather enlightened by the standards of nothingness, which I am.
I have to laugh, as my board sits out in plain sight for all to see what I am up to (and is supplied on my blog for the world to peruse) ...and, I have discovered along the way that a few people I know are following along and doing the same. My daughter walked by yesterday and blatantly said, “Don’t think I am doing chastity with you!” and I had to laugh and explain that Ben’s idea of chastity was not abstinence of sexual gratification, but the use of it ‘for health’ and ‘offspring (like herself) and never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another’s peace or reputation’...she got a big smile and said ‘I like that man’.
Yes, I too, have always liked Ben Franklin, even if he didn’t do his own dishes. I wish I could discuss with him what he thought was tranquil in juxtaposition of what I find tranquil to be. For me, it is at this moment, just a feeling of not worrying about one ‘other’ thing, being in the moment of which I am without feeling the need to be anywhere else, do anything else or become anything more than I am at this moment. In theory, I am tranquil at the moment, as for me, writing is the most tranquil of places and spaces wherein I get to decide everything, the beginning, the middle, the end.
Saturday, April 16, 2011
Cleanliness Statement
Statement from a retired mother:
Leave things behind you as if you had never been there. That is what it is like when your mother doesn’t live with you anymore; everything that has to get done gets done by you.
And, when living with other people appropriately, they never know you’ve been there at all.
Watch closely how others live around you and who takes care of what and when and how often and discover a world wherein there is always something to do, and those who do the bulk of menial tasks are usually women...advise to the next generation...think largely on how to stop that.
Leave things behind you as if you had never been there. That is what it is like when your mother doesn’t live with you anymore; everything that has to get done gets done by you.
And, when living with other people appropriately, they never know you’ve been there at all.
Watch closely how others live around you and who takes care of what and when and how often and discover a world wherein there is always something to do, and those who do the bulk of menial tasks are usually women...advise to the next generation...think largely on how to stop that.
Cleanliness Too
As I am giving Cleanliness my last efforts before moving onto Tranquillity next week, I aspire to deserve my next eleven weeks without giving consideration to the deep cleansing of coffee pots, refrigerators, blenders, toasters, lawn mowers, garbage containers, closet spaces, personal drawers, garages, cars and other modern appliances and conventions that are supposed to be helping us, but make me a singular slave to their cleanliness.
Whew, it is only 5:38AM and I have been up since 2:20AM, so no need for my typical 5:15AM enterprise. I get up earlier than most, go to bed long after most, and now, at fifty five years of age, I have to wonder, is that my nature, or is it how I was made, in order to survive all the things that require cleaning?
Meanwhile, I read intermittently Tom Peters book Thriving On (not Amidst) Chaos (italics mine) in order to comprehend how I myself, have been managed. It is a shocking tale, but an enlightening one.
There is so much to clean up, it makes the young lethargic, unless of course they can join in some kind of army to organize themselves...to help the oppressor...oh my, it’s time to clean something again!
Whew, it is only 5:38AM and I have been up since 2:20AM, so no need for my typical 5:15AM enterprise. I get up earlier than most, go to bed long after most, and now, at fifty five years of age, I have to wonder, is that my nature, or is it how I was made, in order to survive all the things that require cleaning?
Meanwhile, I read intermittently Tom Peters book Thriving On (not Amidst) Chaos (italics mine) in order to comprehend how I myself, have been managed. It is a shocking tale, but an enlightening one.
There is so much to clean up, it makes the young lethargic, unless of course they can join in some kind of army to organize themselves...to help the oppressor...oh my, it’s time to clean something again!
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Cleanliness
I usually post the virtue of the week on Monday, Tuesday at the latest, but since this week has been Cleanliness, and I have quite literally been cleaning everything needed to be cleaned since the first earthquake on September 4th, 2010 wherein we were in the middle of a major move of house, and well, as one might comprehend, nothing has been done since then. Except of course to clean up the primary mess of the February 22nd, 2011 earthquake to keep from walking across shards of glass and pottery, it is Friday now, and still, there is much to clean, but there sure as hell is a big dent in it, thanks to Brother John.
When in a cleaning dilemma, it sure helps to bring in someone fresh to the space, they see through the lens of someone who just sees a mess, not the despair that made it happen. We tackled the garage, or ‘girge’ according to Brother John imitating a Kiwi accent. Brother John has been lost in translation of late, when a ‘skip’ is supplied for ‘dumpster’ and a ‘prawn’ for ‘shrimp’, but Brother John will agree we have been feeding him well, as we throw out what we finally need to throw out in the pursuit of Cleanliness.
Meanwhile, we have been building too, utilizing the many bricks plopped on the side of the road from fallen chimneys, walls, and buildings whose demolition might not have been complete by natural disasters, now bull-dozed without contemplation from many angles, just a ‘bring her down’ attitude that prevails in an unequally ruled world. We still live in a police state here, but as of yet, we can recycle bricks until they discover we have been building something without their permission. So, what are we building?
An outdoor kitchen, with a fireplace, that isn’t allowed either if there are solid walls, but actually acceptable if there are none, and there is no fire ban on. Go figure, there are always loopholes for a lady with an urge for fire, being a ‘fire starter’ is something of a natural lineage that runs deep within me, some primordial urge, grown more urgent when a person feels safer outside than inside a building, like we do in the earthquake territory we now know we have chosen to live in unawares. It’s important to stand beside a fire every once in awhile and contemplate what’s the next move. Especially, when you are done with the Cleanliness routine, not to be mean, but just wondering if Ben Franklin ever cleaned his own dishes?
When in a cleaning dilemma, it sure helps to bring in someone fresh to the space, they see through the lens of someone who just sees a mess, not the despair that made it happen. We tackled the garage, or ‘girge’ according to Brother John imitating a Kiwi accent. Brother John has been lost in translation of late, when a ‘skip’ is supplied for ‘dumpster’ and a ‘prawn’ for ‘shrimp’, but Brother John will agree we have been feeding him well, as we throw out what we finally need to throw out in the pursuit of Cleanliness.
Meanwhile, we have been building too, utilizing the many bricks plopped on the side of the road from fallen chimneys, walls, and buildings whose demolition might not have been complete by natural disasters, now bull-dozed without contemplation from many angles, just a ‘bring her down’ attitude that prevails in an unequally ruled world. We still live in a police state here, but as of yet, we can recycle bricks until they discover we have been building something without their permission. So, what are we building?
An outdoor kitchen, with a fireplace, that isn’t allowed either if there are solid walls, but actually acceptable if there are none, and there is no fire ban on. Go figure, there are always loopholes for a lady with an urge for fire, being a ‘fire starter’ is something of a natural lineage that runs deep within me, some primordial urge, grown more urgent when a person feels safer outside than inside a building, like we do in the earthquake territory we now know we have chosen to live in unawares. It’s important to stand beside a fire every once in awhile and contemplate what’s the next move. Especially, when you are done with the Cleanliness routine, not to be mean, but just wondering if Ben Franklin ever cleaned his own dishes?
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